How to get rid of bad habits. How to get rid of a bad habit. Learn from your mistakes

Instruction manual

Get rid of the habit of biting your nails
Apply a special varnish to the nails. It is sold in a pharmacy, has no color and has an unpleasant (bitter) taste. If this method is ineffective, build up acrylic or gel nails. Gnawing an artificial base (plate) is very inconvenient.
Usually people who do this during stressful situations or when they just have nothing to do (when watching a movie, sitting at a computer, etc.). Try to avoid this. Gnaw nuts or seeds, but try not to “pull” your hands in your mouth.
Go to the psychiatrist. It is proved that this habit is the result of small nerve failures.

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All of the above tips and methods will help to overcome such addictions only if the person himself wants this, and nothing else.

From a psychological point of view, a habit is any action brought to automatism and carried out without effort and control. That is, these are the things that people do without hesitation. Unfortunately, a person is inclined to acquire more evil habitsthan good ones: starting from the almost innocent "kiddies" (biting nails, wrapping hair on a pencil) and ending with really harmful addictions for smoking or gluttony. To get rid of them is much harder than to get.

Instruction manual

Tune in. To get rid of the habit, you need to want this. You do not have to expect much from the very beginning, but you need to believe in yourself. Many immediately retreat, as they already anticipate failure. Therefore, it is best to start small, giving up harmful addictions gradually. For example, first try to rid yourself of the habit of touching your hair when it is finished, learn. Having won, you will understand what you are capable of, and you can give up smoking, for example. Record your commitment to maintain motivation.

After choosing one habit that you need to get rid of, determine its cause. This is actually a more complex and deeper concept than just an automated action. It is based on serious psychological conditions, for example, stress or prolonged. With the help of certain actions, a person calms himself and seeks a way out. The habit of pulling clothes and straightening hair can be the result of an inferiority complex and self-doubt. Observe yourself to understand the reason. For example, it may turn out that you start to nibble a pencil every time the boss is with you. As a rule, during rest, vacation or after a change of work, habits disappear, as the cause is eliminated. If you cannot understand the source of addiction, consult a psychologist.

Identify the positive and negative aspects of the habit. Even the most harmful and evil addictions people enjoy. Smoking, for example, helps refresh thoughts. But listing all the unpleasant consequences (cancer, metabolic disorders,), you will realize that there is much less good. If your habit does not harm you or others, but gives you a lot of pleasure, you may not need to get rid of it.

Use a trigger - this is a short ritual that needs to be performed every time you want to do the usual thing. Choose an action that will bring you benefit and pleasure and help you get rid of the desire to act out of habit. For example, every time you want to gnaw a pencil, start drawing something. To get rid of the habit of getting up late, have dinner and go to bed earlier.

Avoid situations in which your habits are most likely to manifest. Try to meet less often if during a conversation with her you constantly tug on clothes. Or occupy yourself with something very interesting instead of a late dinner so as not to think about it. It is also advisable to avoid people who have the same habit, since imitation is characteristic of man.

Tell your friends and acquaintances that you want to get rid of the habit, it increases motivation. Take advantage of the leverage - for example, give a friend a thousand rubles and ask for a refund only when you completely eliminate the bad habit.

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How to get rid of bad habits. Bad habits have a detrimental effect on a person’s life, sometimes being the main causes of problems in his personal life and at work. They primarily affect human health, and if a person has poor health, then there is no need to talk about achieving success in any of the spheres of life.

Useful advice

Everyone has their own habits. Unfortunately, some of them are unpleasant for others (for example, the manner of being late, biting nails, drumming fingers on the table) and fatal to our health (smoking, the habit of eating up at night or spending all day on the couch in front of the TV).

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  • How to get rid of bad habits

Losers are a special category. They are called slacks, losers, they regret, they are surprised, and yet all their failures are not just an unfavorable combination of circumstances. Loser is a way of thinking. How to get rid of a humiliating diagnosis - a "loser"? In order not to feel like a failure, you need to get rid of annoying habits, change your worldview. This is not easy to do, you have to work hard on yourself!


  • Get rid of the habit of patiently accepting difficulties and what you don't like. Do not eat unloved food, do not wear awkward clothes and uncomfortable shoes. Do not tolerate what you do not like! Feel the taste of life.

  • Do not communicate with people who are trying to humiliate you, kill your self-esteem and constantly criticize your every act.

  • Do not think about what other people think about you, what they will say or think. Your life is unique, you should not get under all, depriving yourself of the initiative. Remember: you will try to please everyone - you will lose.

  • Do not try to overload yourself with other people's problems - you have enough of them. Making promises, fulfilling other people's requests, gaining a reputation of a trouble-free person, you miss the opportunity to establish your own life, have fun and solve pressing issues for yourself, since all your time is spent on satisfying other people's interests.

  • Do not try to control everything around you, take on unbearable responsibility. Get rid of the neurosis - even if you didn’t manage something, do not bite yourself! The physical capabilities and endurance of a person are limited, be condescending to yourself and do not neglect those people who are ready to help you.

  • The path of least resistance is the shortest path to a failed set of circumstances. You may have to go against someone’s opinions, cross your interests with strangers. You should not be afraid of this, otherwise you will always give up your "prey" to someone who has more strength and strength in his character.

  • Do not keep all feelings “locked up”. Sometimes it’s worth letting yourself go and saying out loud something that someone might not like. Do not keep in; find out the relationship right away. Do not complain about life and do not delve into other people's complaints, do not encourage whiners - they steal your time and luck. Sometimes you have the right to anger and love - do not be afraid to talk about your feelings out loud, an open, sincere person has much more chance of success.

  • Do not be afraid to take risks, but do not forget about the rationality of risk. When making a risky decision, consider additional options, escape routes. But do not give up risk because of indecision! Do not be afraid to make a mistake - the one who does nothing is not mistaken.

  • You can’t think only of others. Try to create your own personal space so that those who live nearby will feel warm and comfortable in it. The more comfortable you are, the better it will be around you. Do not forget about your relatives and parents - they will always be your support, unlike random people who will disown and forget about you right away if something in your life goes wrong.

  • Do not spend time closing in four walls, do not be a spade. Do not buy any trash, get rid of unnecessary and old things. leave the most necessary, necessary. Do not collect unnecessary information in your head, do not store it, do not read nonsense - there is not much time in life, devote yourself to reading the most necessary and good books.

  • Do not focus on past failures and achievements. What happened yesterday is already dissolved in the past. Think about the future, make plans, but take care of the present - just as much as you need. Do not be afraid to dream - dreams, especially sincere ones, always come true.

  • Forget the words “I won’t succeed”, “I don’t know how”, “I can’t”. Do not miss the opportunity to learn something, Try to also avoid the words "If you get something ...". A strong verbal formula structures the space, so it’s better to say: "When I do this ...", "When this and that happens." Thus, you program yourself to ensure that everything will turn out exactly the way you want.

  • Do not compare yourself with others. Everyone has their own life, their own mistakes and their own path. By imitating someone, you will become only a shadow, a copy, not realizing your own potential. Do not envy anyone, it distracts from your own life. Moreover, envious of something, we do not at all imagine how many problems an object of our envy can have - problems that we simply don’t know about.

  • Do not try to be perfect, throw out the "excellent student complex" from your head. Try to be independent, but do not be afraid to use someone else's help, feel free to attract supporters and like-minded people to your business. But do not shift the responsibility to others.

  • Do not think about the bad, do not listen to scary or sad stories. Get rid of shyness, slight impudence or

The severity of bad habits is perceived by people in different ways: for some, parasitic words are impossible to hear, the other can not stop smoking, the third is excitement and loses large amounts in a casino.

Undoubtedly, they all have one thing in common: if a habit interferes with life, makes coexistence in the family or society impossible, it needs to be eliminated. Light versions of bad habits Of course, it is easier to eradicate than difficult ones, requiring significant intervention from a specialist and constant support, but, according to Alan Malatt, a professor of psychology at Washington University, it will take a total of 90 days to completely eliminate the bad habit.

How to get rid of a bad habit?

Counseling psychologists and personal growth gurus argue that eradicating a bad habit begins with awareness of the problem. It’s not only important to accept the reality “I have a certain kind of addiction / bad habit”, but also to see the extent of the damage that it brings, to trace the future destructive results of its influence.

Keep a diary.This technique is used to control gambling addiction, shopaholism, alcohol and drug addiction, as well as tobacco use. If you mark your achievements daily, paint your feelings, then for the sake of what the first 90 days of the acute period of getting rid of the habit will hold on.

Motivational saying. Find a quote from a book or a statement by a famous person, preferably someone who is an example to you, who may have independently passed through what you are going through now, memorize his statement. Repeat it daily or write at the beginning / at the end of the report in the diary - something should encourage you to continue, so find this incentive or create it within yourself.

Tear a patch or heal gradually?  Many people ask themselves: what is the best way to get rid of a bad habit - gradually or at once? It would be wiser to choose an approach based on the psychological characteristics of the personality, and here without reflection, self-awareness and understanding of what follows after this or that kind of refusal is indispensable.

Replace negative habit with positive. The secret of getting rid or transforming a habit lies in its very name, so there is nothing particularly complicated - we ourselves are used to doing certain things, which means we’ll also easily get used to it. Yes, at first our brain will feel discomfort, because it is used to working according to a specific program, however, it is also flexible and flexible.

Replace negative habit with positive  you can also radically, as well as break with her, or just by tricking yourself a little. However, it is worth considering the reaction of the body. For example, Kursk with experience will not be able to run as they would like, but those who ate cakes at night will be able to transfer their habit of getting physical saturation and satisfaction to a new rut.

It is important to understand the mechanisms thatthey work when the habits and needs of the body are formed - only then can you eradicate what seemed to drag you headlong into a hopeless quagmire, but we know that there are no hopeless situations. Your life is in your hands!

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Everyone knows the expression "Habit is second nature." Indeed, habits are rooted in our lives, which makes it impossible to get rid of them. Our natural tendency to something gives rise to habits in us, and not always good ones, which over time can lead to sinful behavior. Getting rid of habits is not easy - it takes a lot of patience. Islam provides the believer with such an opportunity to get rid of addictions, providing an ideal environment for moral training.

According to scientists, it takes 30 days to get rid of a bad habit and develop a good one instead. And if in these 30 days you still devote to religious deeds, then the chance that you can easily get rid of the habits that you hate and perhaps those around you will increase dramatically.

These tips will help you change your habits for the better:

1. Awareness and definition of bad habits. The first step in any battle is to know your enemy. After all, how can you get rid of something if you do not know what is stopping you? You must admit that you need to change. If not, then you do not realize that you have bad habits.

2. Work on one habit for a month. After identifying your bad habits, select the most harmful, and work on it for 30 days. If you change at least one habit in yourself, then other changes will follow in your favor.

3. Awareness of what is in the human powers to change. In this case, the saying “hunchback will correct” does not work. A believer always strives for the best and always has the opportunity to change. If you really want to, you can get rid of your habit. Nobody will change you if you yourself do not want it.

4. Remember that Allah loves those who repent: the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said: “I swear by Whose Hand is my life, if you did not commit sins, Allah would destroy you, and He would replace you with such people who will commit sins and will seek forgiveness from Allah, and He will forgive them. "

5. Intention and preparation of the plan. The healthy process of changing oneself requires a gradual follow-up and sincere intention, thanks to which Allah will give your initiative a barakat and help you, Insha Allah.

6. Replace a bad habit with a good one. Getting rid of a habit is much more complicated than replacing it with a good habit. For example, it’s easier to replace the habit of useless spending time in front of the TV with training or reading books than drastically depriving yourself of watching TV. The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was the best “psychologist” of mankind and described this principle with the following words: “Fear Allah, wherever you are, and let every good deed follow a good one that will make amends to the previous one and treat people well.”

7. Change your environment. Refrain from negative influence from others. The environment can have a very strong influence on a person and his habits. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:

“A good friend and a bad friend are like an incense seller and a blacksmith. The incense seller can give you perfumes, or you can buy them from him, or at least you will smell a pleasant smell in his presence. As for the blacksmith, you will stain or light your clothes on him and will inhale the smoke of the stoves. ”

8. Train yourself mentally and physically. The habit of regular exercise helps fight bad habits. Exercise tempers character, helps to resist temptations, which are the source of all bad habits. The will is like muscles, the more it trains, the stronger it becomes.

9. Think of yourself as a changed, different, new person. This is a simple psychological change in your mind that can work wonders. Tell yourself: “I cannot continue to behave this way. I'm better than I am. I am stronger. I'm wiser. "

10. Reward yourself for success. Reward yourself for every obstacle you overcome as a habit. The awarded action is fixed in the mind and requires repetition. Unfortunately, people rarely use this technique. Rewarding yourself for success increases your chances of turning bad habits into good ones and is more effective than punishing yourself for bad habits. And, as Muslims, we must remember that the ultimate reward is the contentment of Allah Almighty and Paradise in the eternal world.

11. Limit your bad traits. If you really want to get rid of a bad character trait, try to limit the habit to a specific time and place. Such a non-standard approach can be a useful first step in changing bad habits or when acquiring new good ones.

12. Tell a loved one about your desire to change. You can tell one of your loved ones that you are trying to get rid of some addiction, and this person can help you with this. It can track your compliance with a quitting habit.

13. Do not stop halfway. If you are determined to change and get rid of bad habits, do not give up. This requires determination and firmness. This is a long and lengthy process, also known as tazkiya (purification) in Islamic terminology. And continuing is always harder than taking the first step. But remember, showing determination, you will still achieve your goal.

14. Always remind yourself of death. The Prophet said: "Remember the destroyer of all pleasures - death."

15. Do not return to the habit that you are trying to break. If you notice that you are trying again to return to the old habit that you are trying to get rid of, then take and throw the money away. This will remind you of the price you pay to return to bad habits.

16. Ask Allah for help. Everything is in the hands of Allah, and we, as believers, in any matter, ask the Almighty Allah, because the outcome of any work depends only on Him. Ask Allah to deprive you of bad qualities, bad habits and replace them with good ones, fill your heart with the light of an iman that will not allow you to fall into sin.

The Qur'an says: “To the one who fears Allah, He creates a way out of the situation, gives him inheritance from there, from where he does not even suggest. He who trusts in Allah suffices Him. Allah brings to the end His work ”(65: 2-3).

If you know something is bad for you, why can't you just stop? About 70% of smokers say they would like to quit. Drug and alcohol abusers try to fight in order to abandon bad habits that damage their body and deprive their families and friends. And many of us have unhealthy excess weight that we could lose if we only ate properly and moved more. So why aren't we doing this?

Habits arise as a result of repetition. They are a normal part of life and are usually very beneficial. They seem to free our brains so that we can focus on other activities.

Habits can also develop when good or pleasant events activate brain centers of "reward." And this can lead to the creation of potentially bad habits, such as overeating, smoking, alcohol or drug abuse, gambling, and even the compulsive use of computers and social media. That is why pleasure-based habits are much harder to break. And in the case of drugs, the help of specialists is often required, since the treatment of drug addiction in Tyumen, Moscow and other cities is already well put on stream.

Pleasure helps produce a substance called dopamine in the brain. With repeated actions, dopamine further enhances this habit. In a sense, it turns out that part of our brain works against us when we try to overcome these bad habits.

Fortunately, people are not just slaves of habits. We still have many areas of the brain that help us do what is most beneficial to our health. People are much better than any other animal, focus on long-term goals and long-term benefits.

After successful resistance to temptation, studies show that willpower can temporarily weaken, therefore, the next time it will be much more difficult to resist. In recent years, however, evidence has been found that the regular use of various types of self-control, such as sitting up straight or keeping a food diary, can greatly strengthen your determination. Thus, you can improve your self-control by doing exercises over time. Any regular act of self-control gradually strengthens your “muscles” and makes you stronger.

Of course, there is no unique way to suppress bad habits. First of all, you need to focus on them clearly. Then develop a response strategy. For example, habits may be associated in your mind with certain places and activities. In this case, you can develop a plan to avoid these places and stay away from friends and situations related to your problem.

Another useful method is to visualize yourself in a seductive situation. Imagine, for example, that you are visiting and eating vegetables instead of meat and sausages. Praise yourself for it. Not the fact that this will work, but sometimes, of course, it can help.

One of the great ways to get rid of bad habits is to replace them with new, healthy habits. Such alternative forms of behavior can seriously counteract previous harmful stereotypes.

Some groups of scientists from National Institutes of Health are exploring whether certain medications can help break down brain-generated behavior algorithms and replace them with new memories and algorithms. Other research teams are looking for genes that could allow many people to easily form new and suppress old habits.

In any case, bad habits, having secured the support of friends, colleagues and family, can be changed, although there are still enough difficulties along the way.

An important feature of any habits is unconscious repetition. It turns out a vicious circle of unconscious automatic actions.

As Charles Duhigg noted in his book, a vicious circle of action almost always follows a single pattern. A habit has a stimulus (trigger) that triggers it and puts the brain into automatic mode; action - the constant repetition of something; the reward is a pleasant sensation that makes you return to this template again and again.

We will analyze a harmful working habit according to this scheme - frequent checking of email or social networks.

  • Stimulus:  You have finished the task and decide what to do next. In this break you start checking your email.
  • Act:  you look at mail and read any letters that have come to you, even if they are not related to work.
  • Remuneration:  you feel satisfied that you have completed several tasks, for example, answered a friend’s email, watched a video on a social network, and left a review about the order you recently received.

The problem is that all these matters are not related to work, you just waste time, and it remains untouched.

   Habit pattern

Over time, this circle - stimulus, action, reward - becomes automatic. And now the habit is formed.

The reward is accompanied by the release of dopamine, so that you have a dependence on checking email, and no articles on productivity will affect the finished habit.

How to break a habit

Interest in action

To take the habit out of automatic mode, you need to pay attention to all the components of the template: stimulus, action and reward. Take an interest in your habit, disassemble it into parts and feel every moment: why do you want to do it, what do you feel in the process of actions and what do you like about the result.

It was this approach to dealing with habits that was described by psychiatrist Judson Brewer in his speech at the TED conference.

What if, instead of fighting yourself, you are simply very interested in what is happening at the moment? Brewer gives an example of smoking. When people concentrated on the very act of smoking, they were interested in what they felt during a puff, they realized that they did not feel any pleasant sensations. One of the participants in the experiment called the direct experience of smoking nasty, the taste of cigarettes seemed to her chemical and very unpleasant. Judging by the statistics of the experiment, concentration on the habit helps to get rid of it.

Try to track what you feel when you are drawn to perform the usual action, for example check email. Maybe it makes you feel productive?

“Many of the things we do during the day provide us with a sense of productivity that cannot be resisted,” says Laura Vanderkam, author of The Book of Lost Time.

But just checking your email doesn’t help you do a better job, it just provides a false sense of employment.

Realizing that the habit does not give you anything, you can change it. And for this you need a new useful action that will replace the unnecessary.

Action substitution

It will be easier for you to turn a bad habit into a good one if you leave the incentive and reward, but replace the action itself. Let us examine email verification using the same example.

You finish one task and start thinking what to do next. This is an incentive. Instead of checking your email, you close all the tabs that may distract you and take on the next task from the list. This is an action. As a result, you finish important tasks faster and feel productive. This is a reward.


Good habit pattern

Thus, you do not destroy the habit, but simply change the action and instead of wasting your time, you get a truly productive day.

Why Eradicate Bad Habits

Getting rid of bad habits at work, you change your life as a whole. Positive changes in one area lead to changes in other areas of life. For example, by stopping checking email at work, you manage to do more and make room for sports. Or, having eliminated the habit of checking email and social networks, you begin to communicate more with your family, find time for meditation, get less nervous and sleep better.

And this applies not only to individuals, but also to organizations. For example, when Paul O’Neill took over Alcola, he placed worker safety at the top of his list. A focus on dealing with established habits has made Alcola one of the most productive and successful aluminum producers.

Choose one bad habit and watch it with interest for a week. Try to change one habitual action within your company, for example, a way of hiring employees or holding meetings, and after a while you will see how this will affect the organization as a whole.

Realizing that habits can be changed, you will get the freedom to remake them in your own way. And having gained power over habits, you can change your life for the better.

 

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