Project on the award I want to start. Research project "Reward in our house". What is beauty for you

In February, I received a Liebster Blog Award. Getting such a reward is a sign of appreciation, a symbol of what the blog love and read.

The award was handed me awarded Nina Ganin, the author of the blog Jesperryn. It is very nice that Nina noted moments in my blog that are so important to me. So, I get to convey correctly to the reader my thoughts.

Award Liebster Blog Award should:

Write a post about getting award. Leave an open link to the blog, the author of which gave you a reward, and answer 11 questions of this author.
Create a list of 5-11 winning blogs, worthy awards, and ask the winners to answer 11 questions.

My answers to questions

What is beauty for you?

Beauty for me in details that support a common topic or concept. Beauty is a very widespread concept, but it applies literally to everything. It is a beautiful house, and a beautiful girl, how beautiful to behave in some situation. In what we do, there should always be a single goal, an understanding of what we want to achieve.

What is your favorite character from a book or movie and why?

"Those who believe that orange will come to replace pink, deeply mistaken!", "Said El Woods, blonde in law. If no one believes in you and everyone consider you a fool, then you just need to go to the store, buy a pink laptop and put the ass to all. Well, manicure, of course, no one canceled

Tell us about one phenomenon that you would be corrected in this life.

When I was small and dreamed of a magic wand, I wanted to guess the world around the world. Now I would like people to listen to each other and heard that two people, appreciate relationships, did not swear and did not quarrel on trifles, would know how to hear and understand what the partner would tell them. So that people are attentive to each other and carefully with the relationship that they have.

Imagine that you briefly returned to the past, five years ago, and you can give yourself one important advice. What would you say?

Be bold! In general, I have an approach that I do not regret anything. Everything that happens, I think, should happen, because we must bear some lessons from this and some experience. It sounds, of course, scary and in philosophical, but it is. Of all my life, I would like to change, perhaps, only a case when in my childhood and my sister and I accidentally broke the mother's crystal vase, and otherwise everything would leave as it is.

Why did you decide to make a blog?

In 2002, when I started my first blog, it was just funny. I learned about LJ, I liked reading the blogs of others, as if you read the diaries of other people, but it seems like with their permission, and I wanted something like that. My return to Brazil pushed me to reread my recordings of 10 years ago - oh, however, I wrote in a different way. "The house you want to come" is a completely different blog. There was an idea behind him, but most importantly, my desire to create and share. Well, I also jealously envy some successful bloggers and wanted "like them."

How should your dream blog look like?

My dream blog is an online platform, thanks to which I develop myself and develop my business projects. And then, probably, everything is like everyone else. The usual desires of a simple blogger. A clear focused concept that is clear to my audience, a beautiful and clear design, good photos that I do myself, high-quality texts that are nice to read, regular updates, many positive comments, regular readers.

What purposes do you want to achieve with the help of blogging?

Thanks to the blog, I hope to find people who share my ideas and interests and, I hope, in the future will be supported by commercial projects that I would like to organize. This is the most important goal, of course, on the way to this, but in addition, I like that blogging disciplines me, makes you write, take pictures, invent new ideas and projects.

What is more important - to learn mistakes or on successes?

Yes, who knows him, it seems to me that the main thing is to learn, do not stand still and develop. I often think so much over something, I try to weigh everything, think over and do ideal that eventually time goes and nothing happens - it is wrong. No need to bother, you need to make mistakes, seek success.

What are you doing if you are sad?

Usually I turn on the hole of Jones, I drink wine, eat cheese, ringing my sister or better friend and Noah.

What the most unusual work did you have to do?

In early 2002, I studied in Finland. Of course there was no money. And although the college provided me with a hostel, food and even dry soldering on the weekend, I still wanted to go to the store and buy an ice cream. Although, to be honest, I have more sigh in stationery stores, where I looked at color folders. Then I was offered work on folding booklets. Pages were laid out in the room packs, it was necessary to collect booklets in the correct order. It is completely simple, although it is not very intellectually, but since it was a civilized Finland, they paid me the minimum salary for an hour established by the state (something like 5 euros). I remember it seemed to me that this was a very good deal.

If you wrote a book about ourselves, what would have she had a title?

Probably, she would also be called, as my LiveJournal and the song Butusov. "The girl walks barefoot in the city."

5 nominees on Liebster Blog Award

But the wonderful five blogs, which I would like to transfer the award Liebster Blog Award. Congratulations to the winners, and I urge everyone to take a walk on the links, it will be interesting.

Such a simple life. Blonde Julia writes about lipsticks, scarves, shoes and manicure, and more about such distant things for me, like a husband and two boys, one of whom cuts yourself bangs, and the second with interest chews kitchen towels. It is incredible funny, and I sincerely believe that I urgently should find some editor and publish a book with its notes.

UXEvent. Anya Kratanova is divided by observations, chips and thoughts on event management. There are many interesting findings in her blog, as well as practical materials that can be applied in organizing the event - from a round table to a large conference.

Think Pink. Date Pink. The positive blog of an anonymous author about women, men, intricacies of their relationship and search for Mr. Big. If you are like I miss the TV series "Sex in the Big City", then you read. Be prepared a lot of laugh.

Like in the movies . The site of my sister Sophia about her life, which is similar to the film, about beautiful places, smart books, adventures in search of lighthouses, gatherings in the kitchen and in cozy cafes, and of course about films. The blog is full of illustrations with doodling style and bright photos - only the mood is already rising.

Niklenburg. Blog Lena and Nikita about their round-world travels long a year. In addition to the history of his journey (and, believe me, it is worth reading), the guys are divided by advice on how to travel on their own and unfortunately, and most importantly, how to find simple joys on travel.

My 11 questions for winners

If there was a time machine where would you like to go on it?
Will you can't pass?
Do you like order?
What lies on your bedside table of bed?
Which country would you like to go?
What do you bring for memory and travel?
What are you dreaming about?
Tell about your first concert to which you went.
Tell us about the most unusual birthday that you had.
What surprises you?
What makes you happy?

A person faces the need to change everything, how to start a new life? What makes him forcing him? Parting or loss, disease or disappointment. In one "beautiful" moment suddenly becomes clear: " if I do not change my life, I have an end».

The feeling as if before you the wall, behind which a new life is hidden. Maybe it is brick. Or from cardboard. To push it? Bypass Find a passage side? I can't decide anything. I just stand, I look at this wall, and I do not do anything.

Which way to change - quickly are options. You can like this, you can edak. And the Mirage is already evaporated away - " that's how I will live ....»

And then - the wall. And misunderstanding: " Why can't I take a step? What does it shine me? "What does it shine me?

Several options. Choose your own.

Fear

« Suddenly I can't? What awaits me there? Suddenly this self-deception?»

Impotence

« I want to go there, I want to break through. But I can not. It is necessary to focus and take a step, breakthrough. And I seemed to have paralyzed the whole body. I can not make yourself do anything. Too much effort is already spent. Minutes go away, and I'm just not able»

Doubt

« Suddenly it is only an illusion, and I'm not waiting for nothing in front? I believe, I will take a jerk, and ahead - all the same? Or, maybe even worse.»

Cargo

There will always be those who will say: " Stand, where are you going?»Will pull back with words, views, actions.

Cases that must be completed before you destroy the wall. One thing. Two. Three. Then - a lot! What is the breakthrough here, if it turns out only on the opponent.

Wines.

« How dare I want a better life? I am guilty myself, that in front of me the wall. I should not poison the beautiful world of the oasis with his presence»

Self-timber

« I did not deserve anything else. Pull your strap - here is my lot. Only a man is strong, brave, bright could break through the barrier, could have heard happiness. I don't have that life gives a reward»

Method to start a new life, how to win in the fight against yourself?

In this struggle you will always be both the winner, and the losers. In any case, you will have to lose something. The usual lifestyle, old habits, friends. But the award can be significant: calm, joy, hope for the future, for whom even the whole open world.

But that the battle takes place that the wall is passed, it is necessary to study well well. After all, besides a psychologist, your ally you yourself. The enemy, no matter how insulting, you too.

The beginning of a new life. What are you?

Pusty or leisurely? Rational or reckless? Logical or intuitive? Sociable or closed? Focused on the inner world or valuable external manifestations of processes?

From the answers to these questions will depend on the choice of the tool victory.

Let's go from lyrics to practice.

You may know the answers to all these questions. Then - congratulations, the task has been simplified. But if you do not understand what is about you, and what is not about you?

The easiest way to understand ourselves is to get acquainted closer as with an outsider. Make it will help drawing or photo.

How to get to know yourself?

Personally, I like the option with a pattern. It is more creative, which means it will use the soul, the psyche, the unconscious.

In the picture you need to portray yourself. Portrait similarity is not important. It is necessary that you personally understood: " It's me!"Best of all on a sheet A4 draw a figure having some kind of similarity with you. Perhaps the similarity will be in clothes, hairstyle, eye color, favorite pose. Image size - as you wish.

Do not like to draw - take your favorite photo where you like yourself. Where are you - happy and pleased.

Sitting calmly, not distracted by a bustle, get acquainted with the hero. You are asked questions, you - give answers from the position of the hero.

Questions to your hero

Here are the main questions, the answers to which are important for you:

-What do you appreciate yourself? Name not less than three character traits or appearance.

- What do you prefer to become happy? Name not less than three habits, or character traits, or external manifestations.

- What do you want to find "Wall"?

- What do you want to leave here?

I really count on your ability to independently analyze. If something does not work, ready to help.

Have answers? Summate to make out of the conclusions to choose your way to overcome the barriers.

These are the options that I know. Again, I invite you to choose.

How can I destroy the wall?

I will call the main approaches, among them there are yours.

Wait and creek.

The most difficult method suitable only for deeply intuitive people who can "feel the moment".

If you can not go to the "one side, then you are not ready yet. There has been a lot of things in your soul that requires internal awareness. Or you do not feel ready to start a new life. Then - see, relying on your intuition. In one truly wonderful moment you can easily make a step forward and the wall will collapse by itself.

Secret: To know that the change is inevitable. Being 100% confident that make a step forward. The feeling of certainty does not come from somewhere from the outside, but from the inside you. If you are intuitu, you understand well what I'm talking about. People like you have a phrase in our vocabulary "I felt something in a different way could not"

2. Small business

How to start a new life - start with a small, but cardinal. Women often intuitively come true.

I went and made a new haircut. Bought a new blouse. Called and recorded on the procedure. Removed from the notebook unnecessary contact. I bought a plane ticket.

Everything, the point of no return is passed. The main thing is not to look back.

It does not require global moral or physical effort. In standby mode - Hop! - And that's it. Without hesitation. An option for those who support is the outside world and 5 senses of man.

Secret: Feel the world has changed inevitably. That is yesterday, before your deed, it was so, and now - otherwise. Even if the difference in fact is only in the color of your hair, but feelings - everything is different! You are different. So, the new "I" can destroy any wall.

3. Salvation army

If you are ready - to attract close people to help. Delegate tasks. Let you, sluggish and
helpless move to the beginning of the new life trusted faces. And you will be able to thank you when you are capable!

This method is suitable for those who live with communication. In someone's house, the doors are never closed, who has a "support group" - sisters, brothers, friends, pleasants with which you can not only talk, but also silent.

Secret: Do not interfere. The task of the "Salvation Army" is to save you, and not work with objections. If objections are too much - add a psychologist to the list of rescuers, which will be professionally winning your "cockroaches".

Start with expressing your appreciation. Yes, the first thing will be quite appropriate to thank the reward that you get. It is the recognition of the fact of your gratitude that will become the most natural, most anticipated way to start a performance. It is at this stage that you will define the tone to the entire subsequent performance. Thinking over what you say, do not forget about the following factors:

What kind of award do you get? To thank for the presentation of rewards or recognition of your professional achievements, you can say something like the following: "I ample, grateful and proud to get this award."
How formal is the event? If the reason is just a family holiday, such as your anniversary, then you can express my appreciation, where you are warmer and more gentle than if you were standing on the scene. You can say something like "I can not pass, as I am grateful to you for gathered here today."

Do not forget to say how you appreciate and respect those who give you a reward. It will give you the opportunity to warm my hearts, expressing figuratively. It is not so important who presents you award - a company or acquaintances: pay a few minutes to express their sincere appreciation to them.

If you are awarded to you on behalf of the company, tell us how you like to work in it, as you respect what it does.
If you get an award from unauthorized persons (for example, from an artistic organization for the film withdrawal), then tell me how it is fun to you that your efforts have been seen and evaluated by such an organization!
If you get a reward from friends and loved ones, tell me that you consider yourself extremely lucky person, because in your life there are people like them.

Tell a funny or suitable case. In thankful speech, it will look more than appropriate, true! One or two short stories on the theme of the events that led you to the stage for a reward, and no one was harmful. If you can easily cheer the audience present in the hall, it will only be on your hand.

You can tell the story about, say, a funny trouble that happened while working on the project, for which you commemorate today, or about the problems that had to overcome.
You can tell not only about yourself, but also about other people - about your colleagues, superiors or com.
If you wish, you can start your speech from such a story, and already go to thanks from it.

Mentill the names of those who helped you. You will be very nicely to mention all those who helped you. You can even make a list of colleagues, friends and relatives, without whose help you would have reached anything.

You can go to the enumeration of assistants like this: "And especially I am grateful to several amazing people, the help of which led me today on this scene." You can then start calling names.
Consider who will listen to you at the time of saying speech. If you know that somewhere there in the hall is your boss, then thank it.
This part of speech, oddly enough, can be one of the most difficult. Do not forget anyone whose contribution to your success was significant, but do not thank those who do not know. Limit a list of those who really helped you.
Look at speech with Oscar ceremonies or Emmy to see how you can thank a lot of people so that it sounds beautiful.

Finish speech on a high note. When you finish listing those whom we would like to thank, then know: you, in general, have almost finished. You can put the final point by thanking the gathered once again and repeating your words of appreciation. If you want your speech to be remembered especially, you can use the advice below:

Tell me something inspiring. If you take a reward for the achievements achieved on the Niva, so to speak, "non-profit" labor, it will be appropriate to the phrase like "Our work is still far from completion, but now she has changed hundreds of people for the better life. We need to roll the sleeves and continue to work, and even harder than before. If in just a year we have achieved such a stripping change, then what can we achieve in three years? "
Dedote a reward to someone. You can dedicate her, say, your favorite person or your mentor. What can I say in this case? Let's say, that's what: "And finally, I would like to say that I dedicate this reward of my mother. When my teachers told her that my dyslexia would hurt me even learn to read, she did not move away and did not give up. It was she who told me that one day I will become an excellent writer. It was her faith in me and allowed me to achieve everything. And here, getting your first Pulitzer Prize, I want to say that you are infinitely grateful, mom. I love you".

We are in the zozhkin very much love what Steve Camumb writes, the owner of the project NERDFITNESS.COM. And this motivating article entered the top according to the American coaches of The PTDC. In general, we spent a couple of days to translate it for our favorite readers. Because the article is the fire!

If suddenly you have not started, then when you finally decide to join the zoom, then you may need some kind of resolutions in front of you to change your life:

From now on, I'm going to do every day!
I will start using flosses for teeth!
From now on, I start to eat great!
Throw smoking!
I am recorded on fencing (well or crossfit)!

Fine, glad for you.

Yes, seriously, I wonder how you can turn it.

Oh, perhaps you have already said something to friends, posted in our telegram channel, shared in Instagram or even organized a club on sports interests at work.

Although I always raised my voice against loud resolutions and a duct of pathoral fitness promises, this year I changed my mind.

When you put a goal for this year and you are in the mood "New Year, new I!" Or there was some big event on you and you decide: "This is the very year when I will give myself in the form." - I'm here to help you.

Everyone has goals - they give us a feeling where you need to strive. Just need to be correctly achieved.

I want in half a year you watched 6 months ago and did not know the "old yourself", instead of thinking "what the hell! Why am I still in the same place where I started! "

Why we can't go to a healthy lifestyle

"I know what I need to do, I just can't make it make it!" Welcome to the club - we all know what we need to do, but we can all make themselves begin to make important changes with them.

We know how to bring themselves in the form : Move more, eat less.

We know how to train : Increase the pulse, do push-ups, becomes stronger.

We know how to eat : more vegetables and protein and less sugar.

But nevertheless, most of us cannot tightly adhere to any of these principles at least a few weeks in a row.

Why?

Just: to build a new sick-habit is difficult, the brain constantly builds the goats to resist this, we do not understand the mechanism of education of new habits. Life will complain and by default we economically behave along the path of least resistance, because it is the easiest way.

As a result, we do not pass along the path of fixing habits.

We rely so much on your own power and motivation (and in vain! -

We rashly smear your mouth on too big loaf, start moving too quickly and too much, very quickly burn and end with it.

Responds to you?

I'm going to eat a kilogram of vegetables per day and
I will run 5 km every morning and
3 times a week I will go to the power.

If the cucumber is not a friend you, you never run and do not know the phrase "free weights", then change all these habits for the first (and last) Sent - this is the right way to not succeed in any of the promises..

We used to expect and easily get everything we need. Now it is not always necessary to leave the car to get burger, you can easily heat the frozen food in the microwave or go to the 24-hour restaurant. If we need a game, we can in a pair of taps to download it on your smartphone, any film in accessibility via the Internet.

But with some habits, everything is not so simple.

We talk ourselves "Damn, I already have 2 weeks here, why am I still not looking like Ryan Reynolds?!" It is not too superfluous to remind you that we spend the entry into an unhealthy form years, it is very optimistic to hope to expand the trend in just 2 weeks.

And then we miss one of the training, because there was force majeure or paws, and now it works, we understand that everything is not as simple as with the TV shows andM & M's.

For these reasons, the overwhelming majority:

Trying to change too much just right away
Impatient in anticipation of the result, want to get everything much faster
As soon as the schedule of life becomes dense, the head is thrown out of it.

These are the main reasons for which complete people are doomed to stay full, and why they can't build healthy habits. It turns out like in a video game where too many enemies attack on you and inevitably - Game Over!

We are running in this article on specific healthy habits that need to be mastered, but before it is important to ask yourself "Why?"

Be honest with the answer to the question: why do you need a call?

Before starting to build healthy habits very important to have good reasons for this - and why it is important for you to put healthy habits in the first place - otherwise no movement will happen.

Without a good reason, the call is doomed - you are doomed. If you decide to deal with yourself simply because "should lead yourself in shape," then quit at the same second as soon as you have more important things.

If you are forcibly dragging yourself in the hall, because "must" and run on a treadmill 5 days a week, because you need, but you hate this lesson - you are in the ass.

But if you want to turn the head of the habit, which is part of something important for you - then such a struggle is worth the effort.

What is it most important to you? Perhaps you want to bring yourself into shape to feel more confident and finally start walking on dates and hide it?

You do not just eat vegetables, you reduce the percentage of fat to to get into the dress of your dreams at your wedding?

You get up early and drag yourself on a jog to work on your personal project and have time to earn a college to children Before they grow up.

I call it "Big Why" ("good causing") - without them you just make yourself do what you do not want and therefore it does not last long.

Get off in yourself and find your big why is important for you personally.

And now let's plunge into the science of training habits.

What is the habit of

The habit has 3 components:

Trigger - What starts the usual action. It may be feeling: I'm tired, I'm hungry, I'm bored, I'm sad. Or it can be a certain time and day of the week: on Thursday morning, I go to filmmakers. Or circumstances: the project is finally delivered.

Rutin - Action Self. It can be something negative, from what you want to get rid of: You drink a gas meter, overeat sweet, drink alcohol, smoke a cigarette. Or something positive: go to the gym, on a jog, read the book.

Award (positive fixation - as a result of the usual action): I temporarily feel happy. I successfully distracted myself. I forgot about the bad day, etc.

Depending on the composition of the routine - habits can be impoverished power and inspiration or slowly lead you to hell.

Your body is not smart enough to know what exactly he needs to do: it just wants to get rid of pain or enjoy. And as soon as you do the same actions successful for the body some time - it becomes a habit of the familiar behavior model in specific circumstances.

Brilliant marketing, psychological trap, bad genetics or the impact of others - and bad habits take advantage of your behavior. We are starting to avoid some particular meal, constantly check the smartphone and cannot stop yourself from viewing the next series when it's time to sleep.

We are not born with the desire to immediately eat sweetness at the sight of a closed box with donatas. But as soon as our brain studies and realizes that such a box is usually full of delicious sweets, he begins to want to open and eat. Our brain will push us to the box. And if we force ourselves to stop, then there will be a feeling of disappointment.

We trained the brain with the help of a trigger (box for donates) and anticipating delicious food. Similar example: You see your running sneakers, anticipate the award (buzz from running) and act - go on a jog. All this can be brought to automatism.

"We are what we do, and do not think about yourself" - spoke THE DARK KNIGHT.

And now let's learn how to build healthy habits, sobering with 3 main components!

1. I study your triggers

Regardless of whether you want to get rid of bad habits or get good - it starts from the first step: "What is me triggerite?"

If you want to stop drinking energetic drinks, but they need you when you feel insufficiently cheerful. Your brain thinks "I will drink power!" After a trigger:

Trigger: I feel tired, lethargic, work falls out of the hands.
Routine: Drink power around 15:00.
Reward: Uraa! Caffeine, Taurine, Sugar! I am satisfied! My life makes sense!

Other examples of triggers:

When I'm bored (trigger), I eat chips (routine) and I feel very tasty and satisfying (reward),
When I arrive from work (trigger), I plit on the sofa and play xbox (routine), it helps me forget about hateful work (reward),
When I'm nervous (trigger), I begin to nibble nails (routine) and it distracts my brain and helps to move the suffering (reward),

If you want to get rid of this habit - you need to start with a trigger that starts the action. Just to realize and stay away from the trigger - already helps to get out of this cycle.

You can also start to train yourself as Pavlov Dog: to teach yourself to do certain actions, tiring them to a convenient trigger for you.

- When I wake up (trigger), I am going for a walk (routine)and award yourself listening to cool audiobooks while walking (reward),

- When I feel tired and work rolled out of the hands (trigger)i drink black coffee instead of energy (routine)and caffeine award will remain with me (reward). And I will buy myself a gift in 30 days without energy drinks (more reward!)and a little loss weight due to a decrease in calories in the usual diet (one more reward!)

When I arrive home from work (trigger), I first have to skip over my book for 30 minutes (routine) and reward yourself with a play in Xbox after I write 500 words (reward).

Do you get rid of old or get a new habit - start with trigger recognition. When only you are aware of your triggers - it will give you the opportunity to work on the composition of the routine and award.

2. Make Routine easier: Use the system

Welcome to the most difficult part of the habit - directly routine.

For negative habits - the routines you want to get rid of and positive - we need different strategies.

But for the beginning need to stop relying on these 2 revalued things:

Willpower. You will be able to make the power of the will go to the hall 1, 2 or even 10-20 times, but you can not do it always and give up as soon as the willpower will be needed for other important affairs.
Motivation. If you need a motivation, you surrender should be loosen and then you will edit yourself for the lack of motivation.

And the power of will, and motivation - windy and unreliable and easily leave you at the most important points. And even more so will not be with you constantly.

The world is full of people lying on the sofa in anticipation of motivation.

To achieve success, we will exclude these slippery concepts from equality and use the system (and external forces) to make the routine even easier to implement (or vice versa is more difficult - if it comes to the "bad" routine from which you want to get rid of).

This can be done in several ways:

Haki Environment: Make a routine easier, removing obstacles on her way (and, accordingly, on the contrary, create obstacles to the "bad" routine).
Progamy Lifehaki: Add a useful habit of your diary, track progress, make a useful routine - part of important work tasks today.

We are the products of our environment. And we can change the environment so that it helps us change yourself. Look at the space in which you most often spend time. Reduce the number of steps between you and a good habit (and increase - with "bad").

Here are 5 examples of simple environmental change that we can use:

Run every morning: To do this, put your favorite sneakers before bedtime next to bed and take a gently fold for running. Yes, damn it, you can even sleep in running clothes.

Put your smartphone with alarm clock to the far end so that in the morning you i had to get upto turn it off. Put the alarm clock for all week ahead so that you do not have to do it every evening.

Go to the gym after work: Collect a bag in the hall per day before. Therefore, every morning you will have a collected bag for the hall, which can be easily captured with you into the car. After the end of the working day - you are already going to the gym and the lack of a bag with the sports form you definitely does not interfere.

Eat right: Just don't give yourself a chance wrong - throw away from the refrigerator and the kitchen cabinet "JankFud" and start cooking in advance. Do not set your way past your favorite fastfood. If you are difficult to cook every day, you can do it once for all week (here is an example). And then it is even easier for you to eat healthy - healthy dinners are already in your refrigerator all week, and Jankfoud has already taken away the garbage collectors.

Less watch TV and play games: Use your laziness to benefit. Increase the number of actions between you and watching TV. Set "Parental Control" with a time limit on the viewing volume and ask your friends to put a timer, password and not tell it to you.

I know one comrade, who took the TV to the basement of his house, which lowered the viewing time by about 100%.

(We acted in the zozhkin slightly more radically: while repairing your apartment, they asked to cut the TV cable and launch a hole).

In general: less rely on the power of the will!

Less often check your smartphone: Disconnect the notifications, delete the applications to which you spend your time. Put the phone to "Do not disturb" mode while you are at work and generally put it in the bedside table.

We rely less on the power of the will, so as not to check the phone when it vibrates - just turn off the vibration.

3. Award yourself

Let's now understand the third part of the habit - award.

Analyze, what awards do you get, from your bad habits?

For example, Coca-Cola gives you a cafée pink and energy after lunch when you roasted and feel sluggish. Replace the cola on and walk - and get the same award, but without a negative effect.

Do you like to be distracted from reality, leaving for TV shows or playing games? And what if you switch to something even more cool - your own fantasy for audiobooks and a walk?

If you want to eat less alcohol (or completely stop), you can listen to the award that you receive from it and get something like "Care from the reality of hateful work" or "Removing social anxiety when communicating in a bar or restaurant."

Right in true awards - what you have with a bad habit and spend "reverse engineering" - come up with a healthy alternative with the same reward.

Inertia will play against you in building a new habit - until it starts to bring you a reward and then a healthy habit goes into the clip automatic.

We can adjust our behavior through instant awards or "bribes" for yourself. Beloved to reinforce healthy actions. With each routine, with each reward for it, we have a little stronger fasten it as a healthy habit.

Create awards that will reward you in response!

Do not award yourself for the correct routine of unhealthy food (for example, delicious pastries with transgiors).

Award Yourself for the right routine with something that will help you continue to move forward. For example, buy yourself the best running sneakers in the world.

5 Lifehas for building habits as painlessly as possible

Of course, there will be days when adhere to new habits is very difficult when you want to return to the old "bad" habits. By and large, it will happen to you every day.

And do not leave yourself one (even with the support of your willpie) against this. Stop counting only on your strength and attract external.

Here are some tips how to make the world around help you.

Attract the same as you: Build habits along with a group of your friends, so everyone will be easier.

There is a study that among those who lose weight alone, only 24% More or less adhered to lost weight in 4-10 months. Among those who lose weight with a group of people and with accompanying psychotherapy and social support - 95% achieve results and 66% keep results.

Collect a group of like-minded people from your friends yourself or join the existing one.

Cultivate discipline with consequences: When you can't build a habit that you build, make sure that the routine skip causes you more sincere pain and discomfort than enjoying this pass.

Here are examples of some brutal consequences that you can think of yourself for yourself: Every time I miss _______ this month, I will:

... give $ 50 to my wife, a friend or relative - to what I do not really like.
... run around the house naked,
... Allow a 3-year-old daughter to make a make-up for yourself how to go to work.

You can adapt this list to yourself. The main idea is to make a pass more painful, with consequences.

One pass is not trouble, but do not let 2 times in a row

What will happen if you skip the day? One pass will not destroy you and will not deploy you from your direction - but 2 passing in a row ... Easily turning into 30.

As stated in the study, one-time pass of routine does not greatly affect the process of the formation of the habit. But it is important not to skip a few in a row.

Do not instill yourself habits that you hate

If you hate to run - do not force yourself to acquire the habit of running in the morning. Stop! You can achieve much better results if you select yourself what you really like. If you are hated to you, perhaps power (or climbing, or swimming, etc.) will like.

Bind pleasure with routine

For example, if you do not like to get into the apartment, make a tradition - Listening to your favorite podcasts only when you retire or wash dishes.

Want more often and regularly go to the hall? Allow yourself to watch your favorite TV series on the smartphone, but only during the class on the ellipse.

Ready to build healthy habits?! Excellent! Now try to do less

Now that you have learned or remembered how it all works, do not go into battle. Make gradually.

Do less.

Remember the words Kuna from the movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall: "The less you do, the more you do."

Take one one, only one habit. Make it easy for yourself. Binary. So at the end of the day you could tell yourself: "Yes, I did it" or "No, I did not."

Non-specific habits of the type "I want to do more" or "I want to eat healthier" - much more complex in realization, because it is not clear. Specify, simplify, reduce, move small steps, but move.

Start with simple and small.

Here are examples:

Want to start doing more? Be more precisely and easier. In the first week, add 5 minutes walk every day. 5 minutes.
Want to start cooking yourself healthy food? Start with 1 dishes a week.
Want to stop absorbing 2 liters of soda during the day? Go to the beginning by 1.5 liters.
Want to get rid of debts and start accumulating money? Start saving and fold in a cube for $ 5 per day.

Let your tasks be little and simple! The simpler and small your tasks - the higher the likelihood that you will perform them. And then, after mastering a new habit, you can climb the next step.

Think small steps! Do not hurry! Move so slowly as you can.

And please: Build only one habit at once, do not attempt to create a little at the same time.

If you have already tried before and could not - maybe you demanded too much from yourself. If you try to build all the healthy habits at once - it will not work.

Therefore, move in the pace - one habit of 30 days, not more often.

Start today

I will leave here a quote from the book "Strength of habit": "If you believe that you can change - if you make these changes to the habit - the changes will become a reality. This is the power of habit: as soon as you make your choice, with the help of habit it becomes inevitable. "

And now simply let's summarize all of the above in order to instill that one of the habit that you chose:

Remove triggers: Is this time of the day? Boredom? Hunger? Daily circumstances? Stress?
Remove and define awards: Happiness? Energy? Satisfaction?
Determine your new routinewhich in about 30 days will be your new habit. And do not worry because of one pass.

And may the strength and you will be with you!

"I have to be perfect"
&
Remuneration systems

"I have to be perfect"

Previously, we investigated the subconscious goblin by the name of the Fear of Consciousness. Now we smoothly approached the belief system underlying this: "I have to be perfect."

As we installed during our study, perfectionism is one of the greatest concerns provocateurs. Its consequences include: delay, uncertainty, alcoholism, drug addiction, broken relations and other. We all all from time to time suffer from the attacks of perfectionism, and then we are horrified by mistake. But some of us are in a constant fight with these self-destructive beliefs.

"I have to win this contest"
"I have to fulfill this work flawlessly"
"I must be the best"

Please note that before each such perfectionist inner conversation is the word "must". Even if the word should not pronounce, it is necessarily implied. Whether you felt that "must", you fell into a frying pan. You fell victim to a relationship, which says: "Any imperfect fulfillment of the desire is unacceptable." But the perfect does not exist among people.

Part of you of course understands that the concept of perfection is possible only ideally and motivates you to find a better in yourself. Indeed, this part wants to develop ideas, plans, goals and then turn them into reality. However, the other part of you, which is perfectionism, refuses to allow the ball to roll (change and evolve).

Your logic tells you that regardless of what you do is most likely it will not be perfect. For some, it is already difficult to endure rumbling perfectness, psychological pain, humiliation and disgust to yourself, which are the result of this impossible standard.

Effects? Whenever part of you, who wants achievements begins to move to the door of the self-discipline, your perfectionist part, lubricates the handle. This behavior is an attempt by Hyde to avoid the upcoming concern that you touched the imperfection

Tip: You will create more self-discipline and achievements, taking the fact that the conviction "I must be impeccable" is a hindrance, not help, regardless of your efforts. Approval "You can not do right, do not do at all," as a rule means it will not be done. But if you challenge this irrational belief as soon as it arises, you will soon realize that the reality of achieving the result is more pleasant of the dream of his perfection.

Attention: Hyde will try to tie you with perfectionism and move away from the self-discipline, saying:

"You do not want to write a bad report, right?",

"You do not want to do the work inactively, right?",

"You do not want to be called incompetent?".

Do not let yourself fool yourself. Of course, various projects require different quantities of attention, time and effort. Trust your feelings of the desired and necessary level of effort that you want to attach to the project.

Perfectionism weakens perseverance. And perseverance gives more achievements than talents, mind or luck. In fact, the path to achieving the goal lies through perseverance.

"Nothing in the world can replace perseverance.
Only talent cannot: there is nothing more common,
What unrealized talent.
Only education can not: in the world full of educated losers.
One perseverance of omnipotent
Kalvin Kurlyge

These are simple, pleasant and effective exercises that you can use to train your subconscious, thanks to which it really realizes that nothing bad happens if you do not make a specific project perfect.

Try it: In the next few weeks, write several mediocre letters to different friends. Do not qualify for mind, genius or perfection, but do not say that it is just unsubsions. In other words, in a letter, do not apologize for insufficient perfection. You do not write a great American novel. Do not tie your self-esteem for the event. Do not waste a lot of time to be a methodical, the task is to quickly write a mediocre letter and continue the usual life. In your power, all considerations about the content. As for the length - make it brief. Once again: Under any conditions, do not admit that the mediocrity of the letter is your goal.

Performing this exercise you really reprogram your attitude to perfectionism, both conscious and unconscious.

Powerful tool: Remuneration Systems

Have you ever used a carefully thought out, structured remuneration system that helps you start and finish your projects? If not - you should develop it. You are going to explore a simple system that will motivate you to action. The system will also reduce the conflict between you and Heyd, when the time comes to act and you will come across the real steps leading you to achieving your goal. But, at the beginning, a few words about remuneration.

In human relationships, remuneration was historically used to maintain the desired behavior. Tons of research emphasize the benefits of using remuneration. Systematic remuneration is a golden key that is painlessly heating the door to your self-discipline. Based on the foregoing, let's quickly understand with the hectares of Heyda until they started. One of the favorite tricks of Heyde is to say something like: "I do not deserve a reward for what I have to do in any case," "I consider it wrong to give myself a reward, it's like a bribe", "The feeling of well done work - Sufficient award for me. "

Do not buy this. Heid uses such a tricky line of behavior to prevent you from using the power of the remuneration system, to feed your self-discipline. Do you feel that you take a bribe, picking at work a check with a salary? Of course not. Unfortunately, "well-done work" will not strengthen your positive actions so to be sure that you repeat them. For this, you need psychological motivation that only tangible remuneration can give. Successful self-discipline requires the study and regular use of the benefits of the remuneration system. Believe me, the remuneration is the easiest, efficient and affordable method of psychological motivation, for the initiative and completion of your projects.
People who visited my master classes, seminars and trainings, celebrate great benefit of the personal system of remuneration, including praise, contracts and gradual steps.

1) praise yourself: Each time even the smallest steps to a big goal, immediately accompany your action by praise. Correctly, immediately note every positive thought, feeling or action, no matter how small and insignificant it may seem to you that supports the inner dialogue.
For example:

For example:
"I feel great because I did it"
"Congratulations! You did it"
"Made well!"

The beauty of this method is that you can apply it at any time and anywhere. After a while, these small phrases will begin to loosen your resistance to do what you need, but do not want. Try! Soon you will begin to feel, everything is more and more comfortable when you make the next step towards your goal. And immediately patting himself on the shoulder, at the end of each step, you increase the level of self-esteem, which is the key ingredient in the recipe of self-discipline.

Tip: Try to use the words of someone from your past, which once provided you with support. Try to hear the sound of the voice of this person. This will give you an additional subconscious force for interactions with Heyd, with that of your part that the self-discipline does not want. But remember, this technique is only one third of the remuneration system that you will use. Repeat them often, but the phrases are building short and simple. Short phrases like "good work", "do not give up", "you will succeed", spoken by a solid and confident voice, psychological wonders are creating. This technique is too simple to not use it constantly.

Important: If you stumble in self-discipline, do not scold yourself. Do not call yourself stupid, lazy or stubborn. This type of internal dialogue is ineffective, it is a hidden form of punishment and is working to lower your level of self-esteem. Promotions change behavior better than punishment. Therefore, when you stumbled, and you will turn around, because you are a person, tell me: "I stumbled. Nothing wrong. Next time I will do better. " That's right, loosen the grip. And even if you have a feeling that you should be strongly criticized for the error, the truth is that your effectiveness on a long distance will be higher if you do not punish yourself. Therefore, as soon as you hear hit Hyde, convert them to a couple of soothing and understanding the messages for yourself. And make sure you smile at the same time - so your subconscious will finally be sure that you are not angry with yourself.

2) Contracts: Contracts with themselves are a powerful psychological tool that can be used to encourage each step made to achieve the goal. You enter into an agreement with yourself just as conclude it with another person. Concluding a contract with yourself, be accurate in the description of actions and remuneration. Sometimes it helps the translation of the agreement into numbers.

For example: Every time I work thirty minutes over the task of my list of cases, I award myself with thirty minutes of watching TV, as I honestly deserve it. "

"For each box, which I will fill and summarize, I will put five dollars to the foundation that will be used on the unpunted acquisition of that new ____________________, which I wanted to buy."

For each kilogram of weight, which I drop, I will put 10 dollars in the weekend trip fund in ________________, which I wanted to do.

Tip: Simple written contracts with themselves will give you more energy of self-discipline than verbal. The act of letters, physiologically and psychologically involves you in the agreement, thereby adding even more energy into your efforts.

3) gradual steps: Perhaps this is the most powerful tool in any reward system. Remember that all your projects on self-discipline must be based on a step-by-step method and each step should be rewarded. This is fair regardless of how small the step is, or how small the award is. Since the first few steps in the project may seem too small to earn an award, many people make a mistake with postponement of remuneration before they completed more, visible, or difficult steps of their project. Such an approach leads to reverse results, since it ignores the psychological advantages of a solid remuneration system that works throughout the project.

In other words, using the awards at the beginning, the middle and end of the project, you will receive a psychological ascent from the realization that the whole project received pleasant promotion, and not just the results. It will also be able to help you when you come to the parts of your project that are outside the comfort zone. In addition, it will help you begin work on the next project.

Remuneration gives you additional forces in order to negotiate with Heyd. You know what Heid loves better than anyone on this planet. Use this knowledge so that Hyde worked for you than against you.

Exercise: Create a list of remuneration.

And now, it's time to create a simple remuneration system based on your own preferences. Make this exercise in writing, and not just think about it. It will come in handy later. All you need to do is take a piece of paper and handle. Then you need to write down all the things you like to do for entertainment, I repeat, it is for entertainment. Think about movies, travel, courses, television, concerts, toys for adults, clothes and the like and so on. The longer the list, the better.

When you end the first ideas, the list is not finished yet. Expand it as soon as you can come up with additional pleasures. Always replenish the list as soon as you think about about additional pleasures. Make sure each item of your list is numbered. Do not worry about the order in which rewards appear in the list. It is important that each item is described briefly. The word "film" is well suited.

Do not complicate this exercise, do not turn it into a routine. You describe remuneration, fill the list with joy. Write down a lot of wonderful pleasures! Each reward from your list will be a powerful tool in your negotiations with Hyd. Therefore, do not feel the sleeves later! Your remuneration list is also important for self-discipline as a list of cases. Moreover, it is important to write out rewards, and not just think about them. We will use your list in combination with a plan of action that will appear later. I repeat: the remuneration system is a key ingredient in your self-discipline recipe. So, generously use rewards and your self-discipline will taste much better.

Example: list of awards

My rewards.

Go to the movies
Borrow movie
Lost in a good restaurant
Buy a couple too expensive shoes
Fifteen minutes chat by phone
Stupid view TV with popcorn, one hour
Relaxing on the beach, one hour
Weekend vacation
Weekly vacation
Go feed the ducks
All day video movie
View play
Read the chapter of the book
Read the whole book
Buy a magazine
Read Journal
Hour listening to music
Go to the music concert

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